Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Piss poor work experience

I'm back! Sorry folks, I had a project for work that required all of my attention.

I am one of the lucky ones where I work to be privy access to the Executive Bathroom. It's nothing fancy, just a private bathroom for a select few to use. Well, up until recently, it was also a well-kept bathroom. The cleaning crew tended to it regularly and you could always feel good (clean) about using it. This was perfect for me because I hate, no loathe using public restrooms. I'm not a germ freak like "Monk", but I can't stand the idea of sitting on a toilet that thousands of others have sat on.

Well, for the past 2 months or so, the "executive" bathroom has been a complete mess. Piss on the floor, on the seat, even on the fucking walls. The cleaning crew do their job as normal and sure enough, its back to being a piss-infested shit hole. Well, at this point a few of us are very disgusted. Well, I mentioned it to the cleaning crew and asked that they call my extension and let me know when they have cleaned the executive facilities. Well, Tuesday and Wednesday went by and I got the calls as expected, 3 times each day. Shortly after my confirmation that they were cleaned, I went and inspected the facilities. At the time of my inspection, they remained clean. It wasn't until later in the afternoon that I noticed they were defiled once again. Damn, the culprit did his dirty work unnoticed.

Now, Thursday comes along and at 11:45 AM on the dot, I get my call saying the facilities have just been cleaned. In the time that it took me to walk down the hall to the executive bathroom, someone had occupied it. So, I patiently waited my turn and when the moment presented itself, I went in to take a piss. Low and behold, the bathroom was a complete disgrace. Piss on the floor, the seat and even the wall. "MOTHER FUCKER!!!!" Well, it's no secret now who the fucking slob is and as I suspected, it was one of the new inductees. Well, me being me, before I make his disgusting nature public, I decided to confront him privately.

(For the sake of anonymity, let's call him Gary ... cause that's his name. LOL)

Me: "Hey Gary, got a second?"

- Gary: "Sure."

Me: "Let's go the conference room."

- Gary: "..."

(Walked into the conference room and closed the door)

Me: "Are you aware of the fact that you left a mess in the men's room?"

- Gary: "How so?"

Me: "It had just been cleaned and now its a mess already."

- Gary: "I am not the one that pissed all over."

Me: "I never said anything about piss."

- Gary: "..."

Me: "Look, dude. I'm coming to you first because I am certain you do not do it intentionally."

- Gary: "Of course not."

Me: "Good. Now, is it too much to ask you to simply clean up after yourself? I mean, I know that nobody is perfect and that we all get winky dinks from time to time."

- Gary: "Don't we have people who clean it."

Me: "Dude, I'm sure that they don't enjoy cleaning up your piss everyday and I'm more than certain that you don't schedule your taking leaks in accordance with the fucking cleaning schedule for the men's room."

- Gary: ".... No."

Me: "So then its a simple matter of you cleaning up after yourself. That's all I'm asking."

- Gary: "And why should I do what you say?"

(Oh boy! .... There goes that internal switch.)

Me: "Well, because the next time I find the bathroom a mess, I am going to grab you by your neck and drag you over there and proceed to wipe up your disgusting mess with your shirt while you are still wearing it. That's why!"

- Gary: "... (blink)"

Me: "Now I've come to you in a civilized, cordial manner and have kindly asked that you clean up your own piss in the event that you spray the men's room. That's about as nice as I can get. Please don't make me show you how mean I can be. Just clean up your mess and all will be well."

- Gary: "...... Okay."

Today I came back into the office and my boss called me in his office. He asked if I had "threatened" Gary. Apparently, Gary took my day off as an opportunity to rat me out to the boss. Anyway, I explained the whole situation and that I had kindly asked that he do his part in keeping our executive bathroom clean by tending to his own mess. After explaining the who thing, here is my Boss' response.

Boss: "Well, if you had threatened him, you should apologize to him personally and privately so that I don't have to investigate the matter. If you had not threatened him, he apparently perceived it in such a manner that you did and I kindly ask that you apologize to him anyway. Now, whether or not you threatened him in any manner, GREAT FUCKING JOB! That bathroom was becoming a shit hole but for the past few days it has been fucking spotless! ((laughs)) That's all."

I walked out of my Boss' office, over to Gary's cube and said "I'm sorry" and that was that.
Tuesday, July 18, 2006


Blogger Obasso of Views from the Back Row started the blog-trend of Half-Nekkid Thursdays where bloggers can put their self-confidence on display by posting half-naked pictures of themselves via their blogs. This is a beautiful thing (usually) and Obasso should be commended for his foresight and creativity. (Though on his site he actually credits someone else for the base idea.)

Now Evilicious Blonde and myself want to try and start our own blog-trend.


All bloggers at one point or another suffer from "blogger block" where it's hard to come up with new stuff to write about. Well, here's your chance to let somebody do it for you.

The idea is to let another blogger post on your blog and in turn, you post on their's. It's as simple as that.

Feel free to "twist" with as many bloggers as you can handle. All that I ask is that you begin the subject of any switch-post with "Twisted Tuesday" so that the trend has a better chance of catching on.

I think this will make for some really fun blogging, plus it will provide our blog readers with a totally different point of view to comment on.
Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Woes at work

For those of you who may not know, I work in the IT department of a large retail manufacturer. Well, part of what I do is serve as a member of the Help Desk. You know? The people everyone call when they have computer problems? Well, today we had a clusterfuck of network issues. Our T1 lines crashed, a ton of our non-static IP addresses got rerouted and our cable guys moved a bunch of wires around on the network rack causing havoc with people's connections. It was a very stressful day and I was reaching my limit in a rather expeditious fashion. Well, I am going to share with you the straw that broke the camel's back.

In one of our remote locations the email system went in the toilet. They were getting email but no email was getting out. This was obviously do to the abundance of network issues back at home office. Well, this all apparently began around noon or so, only we had no idea. Why, do you say? Well, because the fucking idiots that work in that office decided to email us to let us know. Yep, the people who are having trouble sending email decided to send us a fucking email to let us know that they were having a problem.

Now, if that wasn't bad enough, at around 3:30PM, 3 plus hours after the discovery of their problem, they decided to call. I was the lucky one to take the call. Well, the started off screaming and yelling about how they have been without email capabilities for over 3 hours and we have done nothing about it. Oh boy! I was going to be nice about the whole thing but that went right out the fucking window with that attitude. I flipped ...

"How did you notify us that there was a problem?"

"What do you mean?"


"We sent you an email at noon."

"And why in the hell do you think we didn't know about it until now?"

"I don't know!"


... ** SILENCE **

... "Please call us as soon as it's fixed?" :::CLICK:::

I was so fucking pissed I had to leave my office and take a walk around the shipping department where all the hot Latina women work. When I came back, my boss asked me what happened. I explained it to her in a calm, rational way and she laughed and said "those fucking idiots!" She saw I needed cheering up after that so she gave me a cookie!
Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Spoiled Rotten

Well, it's a bit past my birthday but I decided to spoil myself anyway. On Sunday I went to Best Buy and bought myself a LG 30" Ultra-Slim Widescreen HDTV and an Microsoft XBOX 360. After seeing the XBOX 360 in action on the TV, I can see why almost everyone recommends that you play it on a High-Def TV and nothing else. Oh, and Comcast's HDTV channels kick ass too. Sports in High-Def is awesome, though you often find yourself seeing things you don't want to, like the pits in someone's face or a booger dangling from a nostril. The best part about Comcast Cable is that their HDTV service is standard for Digital Cable subscribers, unlike DirectTV who make you pay extra.
Monday, July 10, 2006

Out sick

Sorry folks. I wound up getting sick this past weekend and even took the day off from work. The radical climate changes are reeking havoc on my allergies and I wound up with a sinus infection. I'll be headed back to work tomorrow and I'll do my best to post.
Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Please Support "Project S4S"

In light of Cindy Sheehan going on a hunger strike, I have decided to start my own little protest.

I am asking everyone to support the SHITTING FOR SHEEHAN MOVEMENT (Project S4S for short). It's simple and it doesn't cost you anything, though it does require a deposit of sorts. To give your support, simply think of Mrs. Sheehan the next time you take a shit. That's right, while you are busy doing number two, make sure she's your #1 thought. I guarantee that you will be moved.

After you have supported Project S4S, please reply to this post so that I know that you are behind us.

Independence Daydreams

Last night, while I sat there reading and keeping my pooch company, I listened to the fireworks show up the street. My poor dog was shaken up by the constant barrage of booms and blasts. Luckily he wasn't frightened to the point of IBS (irritable bowel syndrome).

Anyway, while I was listening to the fireworks, I started thinking about our soldiers abroad. I sat there knowing that the noises I heard were fireworks, and by knowing that I had nothing to worry about. But our brave soldiers must hear far worse each and every night and they know its not fireworks. I tried to fathom the idea as much as I could, but since I have never been in their shoes, the idea alone seemed so off-scale. I began to wonder at that very moment what the men and women over there were experiencing. Knowing that they were celebrating their Independence Day by fighting for the independence of a different people? I thought about those I know who are stationed in Iraq and the vast numbers of those I never met, who in spite of that, still stood between me and harm, protecting me.

That is why they need our support. Not just a few of us, ALL OF US. Despite how you feel about their reason for being there. Despite if you agree or disagree with their orders. They deserve our support.

I'm not rich and I don't have much to give, but I am certainly trying. Here are a few sites that will help you support them in any way you can. Even something as simple as writing them a letter.




Monday, July 03, 2006

Where's the beef?

Tomorrow is the 4th of July, the official holiday for Barbecuing. We generally have a nice sized menu including ribs, steaks, chicken, seafood, veggies and a slew of other BBQ goodies. It's been a family tradition for as long as I can remember. Even the family I never saw during the year would make an appearance. It was literally a day of family, food and fun (the 3 F's). Though it has grown much smaller over the years due to passings and distance. Anyway, as a kid I remember going to the butcher's shop to pick out the meats for the feast. They were always so fresh looking. So red, so clean and they were cut to order. Butchery was an art form and the ones in my neighborhood were certainly masters of it. So now I wonder, where have they gone?

Everything these days is about mass production, pre-packaging and chemical and steroid enhancements. Local butchers have been made nearly extinct by the large supermarket corporations. High volume, mass-production and a lower-quality make for a less expensive product and with today's economy, cheap is king. But is it really that much cheaper? The product you buy in supermarkets are less meat and more fat and the higher-grades of meats are given a much-higher price tag. Butchers on the other hand would always "trim the fat" with a surgeon's precision and only give you the best in quality. Sure, you may have paid a bit more, but you could see and taste the difference. Personally, I would much rather pay the few cents more per pound for the overwhelming difference in quality.

So remember, if you are lucky enough to have a good, traditional butcher in your neighborhood, be sure to support them as much as you can.

Fired-up over Fireworks

The State of New Jersey has filed suit against 5 companies in the state of Pennsylvania for soliciting the sale and use of fireworks. The State of Pennsylvania has a law that permits the sale of Fireworks to anyone who is not a state resident or residents who have obtained a specialized, legal permit. New Jersey is accusing these 5 companies of marketing their product to NJ residents by making it seem legal for them to purchase, transport and display (use) fireworks. Though PA law allows NJ residents to purchase fireworks in PA, NJ law prohibits them from transporting fireworks across the Jersey border as well as the use of said fireworks.

This is the kind of crap that disgusts me about law and law-makers. How the fuck can a state make it so something such as fireworks can be legally purchased by non-residents when the bordering states declare it illegal for them to be transported and/or used? Per the law in PA, a non-resident may purchase fireworks, but they cannot legally use them in PA, nor can they transport them (legally) to a neighboring state. So essentially, out-of-staters can come in and buy as many fireworks as they want as long as they don't use them and they don't bring them home. Well, what the fuck are they supposed to do with them? Buy them just to throw them out? Since they are explosive devices, how come they are not regulated by the ATF or some other Governing office?

Explanation of Absence

Hey folks, sorry I haven't been around as much. I have been given a new project for work and a good part of it is developing a training process. It has been keeping me extremely busy and is eating away at any free time I may have. Since we are getting close to the holidays and work has slowed down a bit, I'll be putting up a few posts for everyone to enjoy.